Rev. David Holwick ZG
First Baptist Church
Ledgewood, New Jersey
October 10, 2010
Hebrews 10:23-25
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I. Facebook may not be the answer.
A. Current popular movie, "The Social Network."
1) Facebook now has 500 million members, all over the world.
a) 56 of you have befriended me on Facebook.
b) I have 232 friends altogether and about a third I have
never met in my life.
2) It is interesting that Facebook founder Mark Zuckerberg has
a hard time making any friends, according to the movie.
a) And he ends up alienating the few he had.
b) (The opening scene reminded Celeste of her first date
with me.)
B. We know more and more people, but does it do us any good?
1) Many relationships seem to be largely superficial.
2) And some people fall through the cracks completely.
In November 1998, a landlord entered the Bonn, Germany,
apartment of Wolfgang Dircks when rental invoices to
Dircks' bank stopped being paid.
Inside Dircks' apartment the landlord found a skeleton in
a chair in front of a television set.
The set was in the "on" position but was now out of order.
It was early November, but he had Christmas lights up and
a TV program guide on his lap.
It was dated December 5, 1993, almost 5 years earlier!
Since no one had seen Dircks in years, authorities declared
the date on the TV program guide to be his date of death.
None of his neighbors had noticed.
And he wasn't some 90-year-old guy - Dircks was only 43!
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3) Some of the people we know, we would be better off not.
a) We have all heard about the sad case of Tyler Clementi.
His roommate secretly taped him in a compromising
position, and put it on the internet.
A few days later, Clementi threw himself off the George
Washington bridge.
b) Many are tying this in with anti-homosexual attitudes.
1> In reality, it is more of an anti-human issue.
2> Cruelty and embarrassment are the new entertainment.
C. Christians have always believed in relationships.
1) When Adam was created, something was wrong. Gen 2:18
a) He wasn't complete until he had a partner, Eve.
b) God made us to part of a community.
2) Modern people want to be connected more than convinced.
Haddon Robinson was a preaching professor at my seminary.
He makes the case that apologetics is less important today
than in the past.
Apologetics is the defense of what we believe by facts and
reason.
You might say it is the attempt to prove the faith to
people who have doubts.
Robinson says people today are not as interested in
"Evidence That Demands a Verdict."
Instead, people want relationships.
He says people are drawn to small groups, where they
experience warm fellowship in an atmosphere of love.
People are attracted to that, and then they want to talk
about the gospel.
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D. Our church can provide what people are looking for.
1) Honest, caring relationships with sincere believers.
2) Opportunities to grow and serve together.
3) This is all possible, but not guaranteed.
a) What can we do to make it a reality?
II. What good fellowship can be like.
A. Cure for depression.
1) Believing in God is not enough.
A study by Temple University found that people who feel
close to a higher power and pray often are 1.5 times more
likely to be depressed than the general population.
Researchers believe depressed people may use religion as a
coping mechanism, and so "they're more closely relating
to God and praying more."
But people who did not necessarily report being close to God
yet attended religious services regularly are 30% less
likely to struggle with depression.
It is because being involved in a faith-based community
helps forge attachments to others, which prevents
depression.
Now imagine you feel close to God AND you are tight in a
church.
Every day will be roses and butterflies!
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2) Connecting with other people is one of the best
prescriptions for being healthy and centered.
B. Deeper sharing.
1) In genuine fellowship, people can share about problems.
a) Nowadays we call this transparency or openness.
2) It is not that common in churches.
Bill Hybels, who pastors one of the largest churches
in America, remembers what it was like growing up.
He saw families that sat in the same pew for years would
suddenly disappear.
Later he would hear the husband and wife having marriage
troubles.
Instead of coming to the church for help and prayer and
support, they fled the other way.
They didn't feel the freedom to say, 'We love Jesus,
but we're not doing very well. We need some help!'
The implicit understanding was that you shouldn't have
a problem, and if you did you'd better not talk about
it around the church.
Bill says he learned that lesson well.
When he got old enough to stand on the church patio
after the service, someone would say, 'So, Bill, how
are things in high school?'
And he'd give the expected response.
"Things are going great!"
He didn't feel he could share that his heart was being
ripped to shreds because his girlfriend had broken up
with him.
Or that he was flat-lined spiritually.
Or that he had an older brother who was drinking too
much and driving too fast.
He didn't say anything, because he felt that a good
Christian just didn't admit to having problems.
Hybels says in many churches, that's called fellowship.
And it shouldn't be.
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C. Deeper caring.
1) Real fellowship gives you opportunities to connect with
people who are hurting.
2) When they share their troubles, you can try to do something
about it. As Hebrews 10:24 says, we must spur people
on to love and good deeds.
3) We may have to care enough to confront.
a) You probably don't think of this as fellowship, but
it is.
b) Call people out when you detect hurtful attitudes and
actions on their part.
III. Jesus needs to be at the center.
A. Churches must be more than warm places with nice people.
1) After all, the Bible says most of us are not that nice.
2) We need to be redeemed, and the church is God's best tool,
if we keep it sharpened.
B. Our human fellowship must be founded on spiritual fellowship.
1 John 1:3 says,
"We proclaim to you what we have seen and heard, so that
you also may have fellowship with us.
And our fellowship is with the Father and with his Son,
Jesus Christ."
1) It should matter to us if our companions are following
Christ.
a) Do they believe in him?
b) Are they walking with him and obeying him?
2) When our friends drift away, we go and seek them.
a) This week our deacons analyzed the membership list.
b) The next step is to send out letters to those who have
been inactive.
1> Some of you think we sit in a circle and rub our
hands with glee as we contemplate this.
2> Actually, it is a burden for most of us that we
only do because it is mandated.
c) Satan loves detached Christians.
1> When you drift from church, you often drift from God.
A> Examples in the Bible, such as Lot.
2> We want to bring everyone back to Christ.
IV. Failures in fellowship.
A. Coffee time may not cut it.
1) In many churches, coffee time is a great time for
chit-chatting.
Not ours.
There is a long line in the kitchen, with sullen looks on
faces as they wait their turn at our coffee machine.
Their hands twitch uncontrollably.
"She better not take the last Hazelnut!"
2) Superficial fellowship galls many believers, especially
the young.
a) And, to be honest, 10 minutes is not sufficient to
share deeply with someone.
b) But perhaps, if we are spiritually sensitive, we can
see clues that someone is hurting, or seeking, and
follow up with them later.
B. We can become stagnant and self-affirming.
1) There needs to be fresh blood or we start to calcify.
2) It is also good to have different opinions.
a) The Christian faith is too complex for all of us to
have it completely sewn up.
b) We need to challenge each other to dig deeper into
God's will and his Word.
C. Activities are not enough.
1) We have a lot going on in our church.
2) Most nights are busy with something or other.
3) But activity doesn't mean we are fellowshipping.
4) You can be alone in a crowd, and isolated when you are busy.
V. Finessing fellowship.
A. Get involved in more than worship.
1) Are you in any small group where you can share what you
really feel?
2) Open up to others so they can help you, and challenge you
to grow.
B. Watch your actions and attitudes toward others.
1) Real fellowship requires Christian character.
One of the sad things about the Facebook movie was the
mean things they did to each other.
Probably none of it was illegal.
But most of it was selfish and greedy.
2) Trust and closeness must be earned.
a) Many Christian fellowships fail at this.
C. Share yourself with new people.
1) Don't limit yourself to familiar faces.
2) Seek those who are isolated.
3) Even better, seek those who are unsaved.
VI. Jesus is the one we want to know.
A. The company we keep makes a difference.
1) Are your relationships building you up, or tearing you down?
2) Perhaps you need to make some changes.
B. If you love God, you must love people.
1) John makes this claim.
2) And as we love people, our personal fellowship with Christ
will grow.
C. How connected are you to this church, and to Jesus?
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SOURCES FOR ILLUSTRATIONS USED IN THIS SERMON:
# 6338 "Man Dead For 5 Years With TV Guide In His Lap," Memphis Flyer,
December 22, 1998. Roddy Chestnut Collection.
# 9370 "Authentic Community," by Bill Hybels, www.sermoncentral.com
newsletter, July 2, 2008.
#33360 "Apologetics Is Trumped By Fellowship," Preaching Now newsletter,
www.preaching.com, October 10, 2006.
#35491 "Study Finds Link Between Faith, Depression," by Ashley Gipson,
Religion News Service, <http://www.usatoday.com/news/religion/
2008-11-05-depression-faith_n.htm>, November 5, 2008. Stephen
Gilman and Stephen Buka from the Department of Public Health
at Harvard University and Brown University Medical School
helped author the report.
These and 35,000 others are part of the Kerux database that can be
downloaded, absolutely free, at http://www.holwick.com/database.html
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