Rev. David Holwick [reworking of sermon on February 22, 1998, and January 25, 2015]
Boothbay Baptist Church
Boothbay, Maine
October 6, 2019
Matthew 18:23-35
THE GIFT OF GRACE (2019)
I. Would you be able to do this?
It was September 9, 1981.
Clark and Vicki Sheldon had just moved to this area.
They were living out of a motel because they hadn't found a home.
As they stopped at a red light on Route 46 in Dover, a station
wagon barreled down on them at a high rate of speed.
His license had been revoked. The second time.
The driver had a long history of drug use, but he wasn't on drugs
that day.
Perhaps his mind was thinking about his crumbling marriage.
No one will ever know.
What we do know is that his station wagon hit the Sheldon's car
so hard they flipped over into the intersection.
The hatchback flew open and their two young daughters were ejected.
Very young - Katy was 2, and Lyndsi was 3.
Both were killed.
The funeral service was held at Ledgewood Baptist.
They didn't know anyone in town, but the accident was so tragic
the church was packed.
Everyone who was there remembers only one detail of the service,
but they remember it perfectly.
The Sheldons, both still recovering from injuries, got up and spoke
to the congregation.
They said they believed it was all part of God's plan.
Just as their daughters used to bounce in the back seat of the car,
they were now bouncing in heaven, with God was taking care of
them.
And they wanted everyone there to forgive the young man for what
had happened.
They said they held no bad feelings for him.
After the service, they got on with their lives.
The reaction of the people I have talked to was that the Sheldons
must have been real Christians.
And more than a little nuts.
Several felt it was almost obscene to forgive their girls' killer.
#4284
A. What do you think?
In their situation, what would YOU do?
As a Christian, what SHOULD you do?
B. A test on whether you are a forgiving person:
1) Does the memory of how someone hurt you still stir up pain?
2) Do you ever daydream about an enemy, and imagine really
bad things happening to them?
3) Is there someone you are not speaking to - deliberately?
II. Forgiveness has a lot wrong with it.
A. Forgiveness is unnatural.
1) Animals don't forgive predators. (sharks and dolphins)
a) Dogs eat dogs and don't apologize.
b) Nations and economies operate on this principle.
c) Freud once said, "One must forgive one's enemies, but
not before they've been hanged."
2) The best-known saying of Jesus is "Forgive your enemies."
a) Seems suicidal.
b) If forgiveness was natural, it would be easier.
B. Forgiveness is unfair.
1) Our sense of justice yearns to be vindicated.
a) More directly: we want revenge.
b) In the Bible, the first case of vengeance is by
a man named Lamech.
In Genesis 4:23 he kills a man for wounding him.
Then he announced, if Cain was avenged seven times,
then I will seek eleven times that.
c) Religions like Islam emphasize justice.
1> If someone hurts you, you should hurt them back.
A> Not to do so encourages evil behavior.
2> For non-believers, forgiving them is forbidden.
3> Even with another believer, forgiveness is allowed
but payback is expected.
d) A grim example from Iraq in 2007.
Three Sunni Muslims, two brothers and a friend, were
ambushed by a Shiite militia group.
Only one of the brothers survived.
At the morgue he vowed to kill 100 Shiites in revenge,
ten men for each of his brother's fingers.
He became an informer for the Americans and falsely
gave them names of Shiites.
The surviving brother said he didn't like to do it,
but he had to.
He said, "We had to kill these guys, because they
were killing too many [of our] people."
That is the logic of vengeance.
It is only satisfied when everyone is dead.
#19953
2) Forgiving may let a bad person off the hook.
a) They may do it again.
b) Consider Megan's Law: should we forgive sex offenders??
C. Forgiveness is hard.
1) A man who forced himself to live biblically.
A.J. Jacobs is the editor-at-large for Esquire magazine.
He grew up as a secular Jew and describes himself as an
agnostic.
He knew next to nothing about religion or the Bible.
He thought, How can this 2,000- to 3,000-year-old book
have any relevance to my life?
For a special assignment, he decided to find out if the
teachings of the Bible could be followed literally --
every jot and tittle.
He spent one year eating Kosher, going to synagogue and
resting on the Sabbath, and growing a beard.
He read the Bible and prayed every day.
The result was his book "The Year of Living Biblically."
One of his hardest lessons was forgiveness.
Even when he did forgive, he forgave with an asterisk.
He read in the New Testament where Paul says love does not
keep a record of wrongs (1 Corinthians 13:5).
He disobeyed this in a very literal way because, before
that year, he had been keeping score of his wife's
arguments with him.
Any time he would win an argument or she would make a
mistake, A.J. would jot it down in his Palm Pilot so
that he could remember them.
The Bible said he had to get rid of that, so he did.
He showed his wife the list, and she just laughed in his
face.
Her response was amusement mixed with pity that he would
even need to keep such a list.
It took a commitment to a Bible-centered life to change
this trait in him.
What could the Bible change in you?
#355
2) The only ones who should be forgiven is US.
a) This is the only easy aspect of forgiveness.
3) And yet this unnatural, unfair, hard trait is at the heart
of Christianity.
III. A little perspective helps.
A. Ten thousand talents was owed. Matt 18:24
1) 100 talents of silver hired 00,000 mercenaries. 2 Chr 25:6
2) Queen of Sheba gave Solomon 120 talents of gold. 1 Kg 10:10
3) Solomon earned 666 talents a year at peak. 1 Kg 10:14
4) David gave 3,000 talents of gold and 7,000 of silver for
construction of Temple. 1 Chr 29:4,7
5) BIG bucks - national debt. 10,000 talents = $1 billion.
B. Not able to pay.
1) Family and possessions were sold to defray the debt.
a) How much do you think you would get for your family?
1> Would you get anything for your kids?
2> Would you have to PAY someone to take them?
b) Defrays maybe one talent. 9,999 to go.
2) Pathetic plea: "Be patient - I'll pay back everything!"
C. The Master's reaction.
1) He took pity.
2) He forgave the debt.
3) He let him go.
D. Far-out details.
1) Huge amount of money.
2) Pitiful attempt to defray debt.
3) Ludicrous offer to pay back.
4) Super-generous forgiveness of debt by master.
E. Parable must go beyond a human situation to the Divine one.
IV. What the parable is really about.
A. We are in great debt to God.
1) Debt = sins. (Compare Lord's Prayer in Matthew 6:12)
2) We think of our sins as small debts. Actually, they're huge.
a) Our debts are to God, and not in comparison with others.
b) A single sin separates you from God.
3) There is no possible way we can pay off our sins to God.
a) You can't roll them over on your VISA.
b) Any attempt to deal with it on our own is futile.
c) Psalm 49:7-8 says:
"No man can redeem the life of another or give to God
a ransom for him--
the ransom for a life is costly, no payment is ever
enough..."
4) Only God can forgive our debt.
a) We haven't earned it, but he is gracious.
1> He offers it if we put our faith in Jesus Christ.
2> Jesus paid the debt for our sin.
A> Only through him can we be forgiven.
B> It satisfies that sense of justice - sin
requires a fine, but Jesus covers it for us.
C> We cannot earn it by anything we do - we can
only receive it and be thankful.
b) It is a popular doctrine.
1> Everyone wants to BE forgiven.
2> We automatically assume God desires to accept us,
and will do what it takes to bring it about.
B. The parable isn't done yet.
1) The forgiven debtor finds someone who owes him.
a) Denarius was a day's wage - not a pittance, but not huge.
b) The guy owes him a few thousand bucks.
c) The forgiven guy throttles him and then demands payment.
2) Instant replay.
a) His buddy offers to pay him back (same terms as above).
b) The forgiven guy refuses, and throws him into debtor prison.
c) Word of this gets back to the king.
3) The response of the king.
a) I showed mercy - shouldn't you?
b) He throws him into prison to be tortured until the debt
is paid. (Of course, it never will be...)
4) Why is the king so forgiving, yet so ruthless?
a) A God of such compassion and mercy cannot possibly
accept as his, those who are devoid of compassion and
mercy.
b) Those who can't forgive are incapable of truly accepting
forgiveness.
1> Can you forgive?
V. How we can forgive others. #64712
A. Seek a deeper understanding of the issue.
1) Bear in mind the other person may be unaware.
a) They may not realize what they have done to you, or
how it has affected you.
b) Jesus on the cross - "Father, forgive them, for they
do not know what they are doing." Luke 23:34
2) YOU may be the one who is unaware.
a) Really listen to what they have to say.
B. Take a small first step. (Swallow your pride)
1) Call them or drop by for a visit.
2) Sometimes it is better to write them a letter.
a) Letters are less emotional and they can read them
several times to absorb what you have to say.
C. Use an intermediary.
1) A friend or family member might be able to bridge the gap
between the conflicted people.
2) Being a mediator is a small example of what Jesus does
with us and God.
D. Don't give up.
1) Forgiveness and reconciliation only happen instantly
in Hollywood.
2) First steps, and even fifth steps, may produce no
healing.
3) But keep doing it as long God gives you breath.
a) He wants all of us to live in harmony and peace.
b) Trust him to bring it about in his own good time.
c) You may find that he will help you do what you
thought could never be done.
Corrie ten Boom, a Dutch Christian, spent years in a Nazi
concentration camp where she was regularly humiliated and
degraded.
This was especially true in the delousing shower where the
women were ogled by the leering guards.
But she made it through that hell.
And eventually she felt she had, by grace, forgiven even
those fiends who guarded the shower stalls.
So she preached forgiveness, for individuals, for all of
Europe.
She preached it in Bloemendaal, in the United States, and,
one Sunday, in Munich.
After the sermon, greeting people, she saw a man come
toward her, hand outstretched:
"Ja, Fraulein, it is wonderful that Jesus forgives all our
sins, just as you say."
She remembered his face; it was the leering, lecherous,
mocking face of an SS guard of the shower stall.
Her hand froze at her side -- she could not forgive.
She thought she had forgiven all.
But she could not forgive when she met a guard, standing
in the solid flesh in front of her.
Ashamed, horrified at herself, she prayed:
"Lord, forgive me, I cannot forgive."
And as she prayed she felt forgiven, accepted, in spite
of her shabby performance as a famous forgiver.
Her hand was suddenly unfrozen.
The ice of hate melted.
Her hand went out.
She forgave as she felt forgiven.
And she was probably not able to sort out the difference.
#3037
VI. Have you experienced forgiveness?
A. We need to understand the gravity of our spiritual situation.
B. We need to fully surrender to an all-powerful God.
When we forgive, we are announcing that we believe God is still
in charge, that he will work things out in the end.
If you really believe in God, REALLY BELIEVE, you can extend
the gift of grace, forgiveness, to those who wrong you.
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SOURCES FOR ILLUSTRATIONS USED IN THIS SERMON:
# 355 “Living (the) Bible,” David Holwick, adapted from Christianity
Today International/LEADERSHIP Journal, Winter 2008, Vol. XXIX,
No. 1, page 17.
# 3037 “Forgiveness: The Power To Change the Past,” Lewis B. Smedes,
Christianity Today magazine, January 7, 1983, page 22.
# 4284 “They Forgave Their Children's Killer,” David Holwick; details
related by Marilyn Patterson, who witnessed the accident.
#19953 “He Killed Ten For Every Finger,” Jon Lee Anderson, The New Yorker
magazine, November 19, 2007; edited by Rev. David Holwick.
#64712 “Estrangement: The Silent Epidemic,” Linda Bernstein, July 19,
2013, Public Broadcasting Service,
<http://www.nextavenue.org/article/2013-07/estranged-parents-and-adult-children-silent-epidemic>.
These and 35,000 others are part of the Kerux database that can be
downloaded, absolutely free, at http://www.holwick.com/database.html
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